It is with a very heavy heart that I make this latest post. In case you haven't heard yet, my idol Vanity aka Denise Katrina Matthews passed away at the age of 57 due to kidney failure on February 15, 2016. It has taken me a few days to deal with this, but now I feel I must honour her with a (very lengthy) post, a post that has been requested by several of you over the years. Vanity was the reason I started this blog nine years ago. Like so many featured on this blog, Vanity was an unsung pop star who was forgotten over the years yet deserved recognition. She did have a higher profile, at least in the 80s, than many acts featured here, which is why I resisted doing a post on her then. But she was my initial motivation, as I was a huge fan of hers from the moment I saw her and she remained my ultimate diva. I had even originally named this blog after her first major film, Tanya's Island, which she made before she was known as Vanity and was using the moniker D.D. Winters. Even my 'Nasty G' name comes from the Vanity 6 song "Nasty Girl". Much has been written about her over the past few days, so her past is well documented on the internet and I won't go into too much detail here. For that you can also check her
Wikipedia page. But I do want to share my personal memories of her. The first time I laid eyes on her was in 1984 when I was 14 and she appeared on the Canadian music TV show The New Music. They were doing a feature on Prince's female protegees. At the time I was a casual Prince fan and had just become a Sheila E. fan, so I was curious about these other women. The moment they showed an image of Vanity I was smitten. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes upon (and still is) and she had an irresistible magnetism just through that one image that drew me in forever. Then they showed some clips from her music videos and I was all hers. The fact that she was a fellow Canadian was a huge bonus. This was around when she released her first solo album
Wild Animal, and it was the only thing I cared about receiving for Christmas that year, which I did. I adored the album (despite family and friends insisting that she couldn't really sing) and I practically wore out the cassette the first week! I was consumed with finding images of her after that and snatched up every magazine that she was in, from
Right On to
Playboy to
Creem, The photos went on my wall immediately. I also scoured the television for appearances by her, though back then we had limited channels and only video cassettes to capture things on. But I wore out those video tapes as well whenever I was able to capture anything Vanity, especially her "Pretty Mess" video. She was always a coquettish and magnetic presence in both her performances and interviews, with undeniable charisma. Soon after a family friend managed to find a vinyl copy of the Vanity 6 album and I was in heaven! The sexuality and naughtiness of both albums were just the kind of rebellion I needed as a lonely, overweight, awkward teen. I delighted in shocking everyone around me with her lyrics and image. Her outlandishness empowered me. I remember my father watching the "Nasty Girl" video and dismissing her after she claimed that she needed "seven inches or more", clearly intimidated by her beauty and sexuality, as he fancied himself a Casanova but knew he'd never have a chance. This pleased me even more. Soon her movie
The Last Dragon was being promoted and I longed to see it, but living in a small town with a two cinema theatre, it was never shown, so I had to satiate myself with the soundtrack and
soundtrack poster, which I begged to have from the only record store in town. Obviously I immediately adored the song "
7th Heaven" from it. Luckily our theatre did show Purple Rain and I had become a bigger Prince fan because of it, as well as a fan of Apollonia, who had replaced Vanity in the movie after Vanity, having realized that Prince would never love and focus only on her, pursued the independence that could make her career flourish. Unfortunately
Apollonia (who is also featured on the Isle) paled in comparison to Vanity in my eyes, lacking her extreme magnetism and sensuality - though I do still adore Apples. As Apollonia herself admitted this week,
Vanity was a tough act to follow. ;) I wished at that time that Vanity had stayed with Prince, as everyone's career who was connected to him was blowing up. (Though she managed to do quite well on Motown and had two Billboard Hot 100 hits.) Teenagers being complicated and fickle, I was soon distracted with my awkward social world. That, combined with the extreme difficulty in tracking anyone's career in those pre-internet times, led to my surprise when I came across her second album
Skin On Skin. Of course I snatched it up, though while I adored the first single "Under The Influence", the rest of the album was a bit of a let down. It lacked the extreme electro-funk and sexuality of
Wild Animal, and while she wrote and co-produced all of the material on
Wild Animal, she was barely present in the creation of
Skin On Skin. Though her vocals had noticeably improved, it seemed a lot less personal. Of course, I still loved the album, and songs like "Animals" and "Ouch!" kept up that sexy silliness. The album didn't seem to get as much attention, however, and Vanity showed up on TV less and less. During that time she was also starring in many movies like
Never Too Young To Die and
Action Jackson (I adored the Jesse Johnson produced track "
Undress" from it and was thrilled she was in the video for the Pointer Sisters' "
He Turned Me Out", also featured on it), though of course they never made it to my two cinema town, and it took years before anything new came out on video back then. These things combined to take my focus off of her. There was one time in 1989, however, when she was filming an episode of the Friday The 13th TV series in Toronto entitled '
Mesmer's Bauble' (in which she starred alongside Isle postee
Robey), that a friend's brother was lucky enough to be at the filming, and he came back regaling me with stories of her. I was extremely jealous. She had been so close! But soon I was off to university and was distracted by my new academic and social life and all that that entailed. I thought of her occasionally (like when I randomly scored a publicity poster of her as "
Miss Audio-Visual 1984", and when I used "Strap On Robbie Baby" to shock a sociology class), but she fell to the back of my mind and became a bit of a teenage embarrassment. In 1990 I did hear that she was filming a movie called Lambada: Set The Night On Fire and was extremely excited about the new song she was to record for it, but it was soon revealed that she dropped out of the film, and the song, "
Gotta Lambada", ended up being recorded by female duo Absolut instead. She did appear in the TV movie
Memories Of Murder that year, which was the first Lifetime movie ever, but of course I didn't get Lifetime. After that she was totally off my radar until 1992, when she appeared in the Jackie Collins TV mini-series
Lady Boss, which I watched with a sort of sentimental melancholy. Around that time rumours were surfacing that she was a born-again Christian, and she then shockingly (to me, at least) appeared on
The Joan Rivers Show that same year, renouncing her past and emphatically preaching the word of God. It was very jarring and, I confess, made me very uncomfortable. She talked about how she detested her carnal identity as Vanity, and discussed her addiction to smoking crack, which led to extreme kidney damage, a kidney transplant, and almost death! It all came as a shock to me, though looking back it suddenly seemed obvious that she was on drugs in many of her early interviews and performances. I have to admit that this new Vanity, or Denise Matthews, as she now wanted to be called, frightened me, and like one of Joan's audience members suggested, it seemed to me that she had just substituted one drug for another. She was an extreme literal bible thumper and even spoke in tongues! It was all too much for me, though I felt ashamed for wishing that the old Vanity would return. It seemed like a freak show, and I chose to turn my back on it. Then, in the later 2000s, I started to feel nostalgic and began listening to all of the older music again, Vanity most of all. Now that the internet was everywhere, I sought out copies of her old movies and finally saw many for the first time, including the extremely controversial
Tanya's Island - now I finally knew what the song "Wild Animal" was about! I introduced her into my new world and forced her on my friends and especially my boyfriend, who was (and still is) a huge Madonna fan, but he eventually warmed up to her as well. I pulled out old pics and posters and put them up. I joined forums and met friends while talking about her, and created several monikers for websites derived from her various aliases, songs and films. I made her my computer and phone wallpaper and screen savers. I was again entrenched in the world of Vanity. Only after she passed this week did I realize just how much of her physically surrounds me in all aspects of my world. I did check up on the real Denise Matthews at times, visiting her
website and
Facebook page, and I was happy that she had found happiness through religion, even if I didn't get it myself. I felt horrible for her continuing illness, and the revelations of her abuse as a child and adult. I read Nikki Sixx's
Heroin Diaries, about his drug addiction in the year 1987, when he was dating Vanity and she was going through an equally destructive drug addiction. She wrote several passages in the book, and I got a better idea of what she went though. But, though Denise preferred it, I couldn't let Vanity go, and I created a Facebook page dedicated to her. I was thrilled at the response from followers and realized that I was far from alone in my love for Vanity. Then a year or two later, I got a Facebook message from Denise Matthews herself! In it she asked that I take the page down, as she no longer wanted her old self to be celebrated. She asked me to call her so we could discuss it and gave me her phone number. You can imagine my delight and horror! Out of respect I immediately removed the page, but I could never call her. I don't want to meet my idols, and I was also wary of her possible attempts to "convert" me. Now that she is gone, I regret that decision. I had no idea that she was so ill in the past months, and though I knew she was lucky to have lived this long, I was still so saddened by her death. And though I know that she did not want people to celebrate Vanity, and I do also celebrate the amazing woman that was Denise Matthews, I need to post this tribute to her and share the music that made me so happy all of these years. As I told her when we corresponded about the Facebook page, though she was regretful about her personal life the years she was known as Vanity, she should not dismiss or forget the joy that her music and films gave so many of us. Without her, I would not be who I am today, which I'd like to think isn't so bad, as for some undefinable reason she instilled in me a strength and sass that I desperately needed as a teen, and I'm not sure that I would have discovered that without Vanity. I am sorry that her life was often so sad, but I think in the end she was truly happy to go to the God she loved so dearly, and that is how I'll remember her. Please celebrate and enjoy her work and life!
Video for
He's So Dull
Video for
Nasty Girl
Video for
Drive Me Wild
Download
Vanity 6
1
Nasty Girl
2
Wet Dream
3
Drive Me Wild
4
He's So Dull
5
If A Girl Answers (Don't Hang Up)
6
Make-Up
7
Bite The Beat
8
3 x 2 = 6
Video for
Pretty Mess
Live performance of
Samuelle
Live performance of
Pretty Mess & Wild Animal
Download
Wild Animal
1
Flippin' Out
2
Pretty Mess
3
Samuelle
4
Strap On "Robbie Baby"
5
Wild Animal
6
Mechanical Emotion
7
Crazy Maybe
Video for
Under The Influence
Live performance of
Romantic Voyage
Live performance of
Under The Influence & Animals
Download
Skin On Skin
1
Under The Influence
2
Manhunt
3
Romantic Voyage
4
Confidential
5
Animals
6
Skin On Skin
7
Gun Shy
8
Ouch
9
In The Jungle
